From Doug….
I was in Cannes (pronounced Caune according to the locals) on the Friday after Thanksgiving…our new national shopping holiday and I must tell you…I have never seen a total population more confused (well maybe after the last Presidential election) than the French were on Black Friday. What IS Black Friday they asked me. I tried to explain that Black Friday in the States was the day after Thanksgiving when many people were still off work. The day has become the most celebrated shopping day of the year…the beginning of Christmas. Confusion…total confusion. You see, Christmas in France…in Italy…in Holland is a religious family holiday…not a commercialized extravaganza. A time to celebrate the birth of Christ (if you are Christian) and to gather with friends and family for food and family…a true celebration of life.
When Maggie and I were in Italy, the stores were open and many displayed the glittering items that we associate with the Holidays. Lights…ornaments…trees. What has been consistently absent from all of the shopping areas we have visited…at all hours…is the crush of humanity. The panic associated with shopping…getting the perfect gift…getting any gift. No obsession. No panic. No crowds. We have strolled through the Christmas Markets (European tradition) in Cannes, Nice, Florence, Valbonne and Monaco. Always the same. Families and couples together…laughing and enjoying Hot Wine and local delicacies. In every town or city, the theme and feeling was the same. Small vendors selling their wares…simple. Nothing pretentious. Absolutely loved every one we walked through.
My friend Pieter from Amsterdam explained the Lights in the city in early December. In Holland, Christmas is divided into two days. The first, St. Nicholas Eve, Sinterklaas Eve, or Sinterklass Eve is for presents. Gifts are called “surprises” and are uniquely packaged to conceal the gift…oftentimes boxes in boxes. Nothing extravagant (typical of the Dutch culture). It is a fun, joyful day. Christmas and the Day after Christmas are national holidays…religious holidays…where the focus is on the birth of Christ. Children do get gifts on the 26th…but the feeling is totally different. Pieter tells me that the Dutch Christmas has been bastardized by America and that Children now do receive their gifts on the 26th…but the 25th is all about the birth of Christ. Not surprising…much of Protestant history comes from the Netherlands…the Dutch Reform Church (Calvinist) and the Lutheran Church (Martin Luther). Peter told me that initially Catholicism was banned in The Netherlands…but the Church was finally allowed to build sanctuaries as long as they were not opulent and disguised as…well…just buildings. Blending into the neighborhoods.
Here, in France, Christmas felt very low key. I went out, with Maggie, on Christmas Eve. Cannes was dead…I meant DEAD!!! I finally found a couple of restaurants open in the tourist district and had a lovely meal…steak, fries, ratatouille…and ice cream for dessert (Maggie and I sat outside…the weather was temperate..in the high 50s). Ryane and Ian, her boyfriend, arrived on Christmas Day. Initially they were coming earlier so I had tried to make reservations for a nice Christmas Eve dinner. Everything was closed…nothing was available. So...I intended to make Midnight Mass at the Cannes Anglican Church..but it got late and I wasn’t feeling well so I said my own prayers and went home.
As a confession, through the years, I have been obsessed with gift giving…spending hours trying to find the perfect gift for relationships, family. Yes, I often spent way to much as if I was trying to prove myself or overcome inactivity during the rest of the year. I think I have always tried to show love, caring, and appreciation and to justify myself as a Man, Father or Friend through gifts at Christmas...my devotion defined by the size, number and quality of the gifts. In contrast, it seems like every year I would find myself in the local drug store or convenience store and watch as so many of minimal means were desperately trying to find a gift for their children..family…with little income to spend on simple necessities...like food. Dollars hard earned and scarce…trying to find something to give to those they love. My heart always hurt when I watched them and then thought of the rampant overspending at our glitzy malls and stores. Extravagance. I guess the saddest story I saw was maybe 10 years ago. For some reason, I ventured to the Mall on Black Friday and ran into a part time waitress from Davis’ Pub…the little watering hole half a block from my old house in Annapolis. This single woman, who had lost her long time boyfriend to cancer, was with her Mother and 4 small children. Shopping. I asked her how her day was going…she told me that they had been shopping sales since midnight (it was 3PM). I asked if she had slept…she said that they slept for 2 hours in their car waiting for Big Lots to open at 6AM…I have never been to Big Lots and cannot conceive of waiting 30 seconds for one to open…but there she was…minimal money available…trying to give her children the maximum she could afford as if being their Mother was not enough. Wanting them to feel normal and loved.
Ryane and Ian are both sick. They arrived safely at 1130 on Christmas Day…and were awake long enough for me to set up their Amazon FireStick with a VPN so they could stream American TV if they wanted. THAT was the last I have seen of them and I am writing this post at 10AM at a little café in Mougins waiting for Maggie to finish her spa day. Maggie and I went out on Christmas Evening and found one restaurant open in the Old Mougins Village and had a lovely plate of lasagna w/a small arugula salad, a glass of wine and a macchiato. Very quiet and reflective…Maggie curled up at my feet. Caused me pause as I realized that this was Christmas. Fond memories of Christmas past…friends. Warm thoughts of Christmas in Annapolis last year…the Annapolis Chorale Christmas Concert, the performance at Maryland Therapeutic Riding (it was COLD!!!), two performances of the Messiah with the Annapolis Chamber Chorus…parts I could not sing because I was choked with tears at the flood of childhood memories and the sheer beauty of the music…and then Christmas Eve and Christmas Day at St Anne’s. The choir performed for 4 services on Christmas Eve and then a service on Christmas Morning. I was spent…so tired and yet so fulfilled. On Christmas Eve, as is our recent tradition, I had dinner at Osteria between the first and second service with Ryane, Ian and my close friend Paul. Between the second and third service, I had planned to go out for a cocktail with Choir friends but Tim Mulder (the Interim Rector at St Annes and a dear friend) pulled me aside and asked if I thought that Osteria was open and if Arturo (the owner) was there. He had a small gift…a book...that he wanted to give Arturo. So back to Osteria I went…sat in the same seat at the bar as before, same bartender and, once again, enjoyed the feeling of friendship and companionship with Tim…as I had 2 hours earlier with Ryane, Ian and Paul. Christmas morning, after the service, I was invited to join Ernie Green (the director) and his wife Molly and their son and daughter along with Tim Mulder (before he departed for New Jersey and family) for a Bloody Mary...toast of Christmas cheer. Very special time for me...being with friends. Ryane and Paul came over later in the day for steaks. I cannot remember a happier Christmas in Annapolis…music, singing, praying, family and friends.
This year, my Christmas was no less joyful…albeit quieter...as Maggie and I dined alone and watched the local people and tourists living their daily lives. On Christmas Eve, we engaged with a lovely couple from Germany who had traveled to Cannes for three days to enjoy Christmas time together. I never made church…wasn’t feeling well yesterday so I slept in until time to pick up Ryane and Ian…instead of going to Christmas Day service in Cannes. I still felt very close to my God and the gifts I have been given in life…friends, family, health, Maggie, and the opportunity for this adventure in France. Memories made and never forgotten.
So, to all of you, I hope that Christmas…Hanukkah…were as special for you as they were for me. Truly you are the greatest gift I could ever receive and I treasure thoughts and memories of each of you…along with friends and family who have passed on to whatever is next. I am a fortunate man.
God’s blessings to each of you during this special season. I hope that you have been able to take a moment, amidst the clamor, to realize why life is special…embrace those around you and those absent in body but present in spirit. Love everyone. Embrace humbleness and kindness.
Turning this back to Maggie…but I did want to share my thoughts during this special time.
With warmth, joy and love.
Doug (and Maggie…she is next to me as I write)
Christmas Eve in Cannes
コメント